---
product_id: 2863785
title: "The Antidote: Happiness for People Who Can't Stand Positive Thinking"
brand: "oliver burkeman"
price: "€ 29.54"
currency: EUR
in_stock: false
reviews_count: 9
url: https://www.desertcart.com.cy/products/2863785-the-antidote-happiness-for-people-who-cant-stand-positive-thinking
store_origin: CY
region: Cyprus
---

# The Antidote: Happiness for People Who Can't Stand Positive Thinking

**Brand:** oliver burkeman
**Price:** € 29.54
**Availability:** ❌ Out of Stock

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- **What is this?** The Antidote: Happiness for People Who Can't Stand Positive Thinking by oliver burkeman
- **How much does it cost?** € 29.54 with free shipping
- **Is it available?** Currently out of stock
- **Where can I buy it?** [www.desertcart.com.cy](https://www.desertcart.com.cy/products/2863785-the-antidote-happiness-for-people-who-cant-stand-positive-thinking)

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## Customer Reviews

### ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐ 







  
  
    Imperfectly Wonderful (but he helps you see the value in the imperfections)
  

*by E***F on Reviewed in the United States 🇺🇸 on February 17, 2013*

The full title of this book--"The Antidote: Happiness for People who Can't Stand Positive Thinking," implies that positive thinking can be a problem and that this book provides a solution.  However, the statement that "positive thinking is a problem" would be too strongly worded--and the idea that positive thinking is a problem for only some people would be too limiting.What is problematic, as this book points out, is *over-attached* positive thinking.  It's more the ATTACHMENT to positive goals than the fact that the goals are positive that is the problem.  And this is a problem for MOST people in Western culture, not just those who are cynical enough to be repelled by Norman Vincent Peale and his ilk.Through an amusing array of journalistic anecdotes--his visits to places such as the Insight Meditation Center in Barre MA, "The Museum of Failure" in Ann Arbor, the death shrine in Tepito, Mexico and to a lively cemetary during Dia de los Muertos (Day of the Dead) in Mexico, or the slum of Kibera in Kenya, and his interviews or summaries of the work of characters such as the ever-crusty Albert Ellis, the ephemeral Eckhardt Tolle, or security expert Bruce Schneier (noted for his opposition to the 9/11 security crackdown)--Burkman makes his case for "the negative path to happiness."The negative path to happiness is to embrace insecurity, failure, and death--to learn that these are inevitable aspects of life, and to gain the perspective that death and impermanence are the very things that make life and our positive experiences so precious, and that our repeated failures are what lead us to eventually succeed--and to, above all, learn perspective and non-attachment to experiences and outcomes, and the art of non-doing, in opposed to our more typical goal-striving and grasping, which often ironically backfire to make us miserable rather than happy.In the course of the book, Burkman reviews approaches such as those of the Stoic philosophers and the Buddhists, and touches on psychological theories such as Dan Wegner's theory of ironic processes (
  
White Bears and Other Unwanted Thoughts







  
  
    ), Albert Ellis's distinct brand of cognitive behavioral therapy (with its emphasis on how the "Musts" that we create for ourself are what create our misery, and how embracing the worst case can make us realize that what is actually happening is not so bad in comparison) (
  
How to Stubbornly Refuse to Make Yourself Miserable about Anything: Yes Anything!







  
  
    ) and Ernest Becker's theory of the denial of death (and associated modern research from terror management theory)(e.g., 
  
In the Wake of 9-11: The Psychology of Terror







  
  
    ), and work from theorists who stress the downside risks of goal-setting (
  
Destructive Goal Pursuit: The Mt. Everest Disaster







  
  
    ).Reading Oliver Burkman's book was, for me, like going to a convention--there was the chance to mingle and catch up with old friends (including, for me, Shoma Morita 
  
Constructive Living (Kolowalu Books)







  
  
    and Irving Yalom 
  
Love's Executioner







  
  
    ) and to meet like-minded new ones, and there was a huge buffet of ideas, each one of you are provided a chance to nibble at.  But for each person that you meet in the book, there is just the chance to say hello and never the chance to fully catch up, and for each tasty morsel, there is just a nibble.  Burkman succeeds in bringing together and finding commonality in a wide variety of ideas, and for that he is to be commended.  This is more a book to whet the appetite than to provide any true satiation--but as any Seeker knows, one grows from the process of asking and seeking answers to questions, not from having the answers themselves.For what it is--a journalistic account, and not a philosophical treatise or psychological theory--this is an excellent and entertaining book.********************************************************************************************************************************************There are three things that I wish were improved.First, his final chapter summarizing the "negative path" to happiness could have been more substantive--the best material on "the negative path" is in the first chapter of the book, and could have been reiterated and elaborated more in the conclusion.Second, while hugely wide-ranging and having the idea that some people will be turned off by positive thinking in the very title, Burkman somehow missed out on the wonderful work on defensive pessimism (see 
  
The Positive Power of Negative Thinking: Using Defensive Pessimism to Harness Anxiety and Perform at Your Peak







  
  
    , which would help address the question of which people might be turned off by the positive thinking approach and why. Some people are more motivated by "approach" and others by "avoidance"--and this issue will be explored in the forthcoming book 
  
Focus: Use Different Ways of Seeing the World for Success and Influence







  
  
    , whose publication I eagerly anticipate.Finally, the book, by its nature, lumps all positive thinking together and doesn't get at its nuances.  There is wonderful work done in the field of positive psychology, and the idea of balance--that happiness involves BOTH removing the causes of unnecessary suffering (which is what "The Antidote" focuses on) AND adding potential causes of happiness (for example, remembering to do a "Gratitude check," expanding one's social network, and doing "random acts of kindness" for others)--is missing here.  (People interested in exploring a more balanced approach which combines these ideas might explore the work on Acceptance & Commitment Therapy, developed by Steven Hayes but most readably introduced by Russ Harris (
  
The Happiness Trap







  
  
    ), and might also explore valuable works in Positive Psychology such as Sonja Lyubormirsky's 
  
The Myths of Happiness: What Should Make You Happy, but Doesn't, What Shouldn't Make You Happy, but Does







  
  
    , which is about how we can do a great deal to make ourselves happier by stopping believing/doing those things which we think will make us happier but actually make us miserable--an idea which fits very well with "The Antidote."As the Buddhists say, "pain is inevitable, suffering is optional."  (I would add to that, "joy is possible, but fleeting.")  Reading this book and further exploring the ideas and approaches you are introduced to here can be a way learn to avoid that suffering.

### ⭐⭐⭐⭐ 







  
  
    Good book
  

*by B***N on Reviewed in the United States 🇺🇸 on May 23, 2023*

Something worth reading I think

### ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐ 







  
  
    Obsessed
  

*by K***D on Reviewed in the United States 🇺🇸 on March 19, 2023*

A high school friend, from some 45 plus years ago recommended this book... which Does mean that he's smarter than I Am! I embrace his philosophy as much as I'm able...and embrace all of life's challenges...including death..

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*Last updated: 2026-01-28*