EXiting the JW Cult: A Healing Handbook: For Current & Former Jehovah's Witnesses

Am only giving this 5 stars because I can't possibly give it 10 stars. No kidding! I dissociated myself earlier this year from the JW. I was a third generation JW, born in it - 30years. Its been really tough. Oh, being shunned by people I have known for years, people I always had in my house for dinner parties. Despite the pain, I just know I can't go back. This cold treatment just reinforces my reason for leaving which was my observation of fake friendships, my lack of intellectual freedom and coldness of it all.I think I wasn't prepared, despite taking my time to dissociate it has still been a struggle. I really love this book. I have read other books on this topic but in terms of actual techniques for healing, this is the best. I love the debriefing and visualization techniques. I have immediately started debriefing myself everyday. Its a new concept and immensely helpful. I have decided to formally mourn and grieve the loss of my social structure. I also like the suggestion to take time before embracing another religion. I kind of hate the idea of church now but mostly because I feel cheated by an religious organization I sincerely believed was build on Christian love. I also like the idea that we must show compassion for those who are required to shun us, its unnatural and difficult for them as well.Despite all this, I really love the freedom and joy I am enjoying now which I never had. The painful moments are fewer and keep decreasing. Thank you, thank you, thank you for writing this book!

All my life I have rested all my faith, dreams, thoughts, you name it, on the Watchtower Society. I am a 45 year old man. Just left 9 months ago. Stopped all Wt. activity 2 months back. Just about had a nervous breakdown. For two months I cried everyday at least once, like a child who's "Mother" abandoned him when I discovered all the lies, cover- ups, scandals. I loved my life as a witness. I was a zealous unstoppable "Jehu". But that dream ended in an instant of time. The worst nightmare of any witness came true. The "apostates" were right all along! As a suggestion, I believe that these 4 books should be sold as a rescue kit for ex-JW's:Crisis of Conscience, In Search of Christian Freedom, Combatting Cult Mind Control, and this MOST excellent book!!!! I suggest reading these books in this order. Their is no book that can help you get on with your life quite like this book. Written by someone who was truly involved with the Watchtower and now a professional in psychology . This book gives practical, professional advice on how to deal with the psychopathic residue of this most deceptive cult. Escape the childlike behavior of having to answer to "Mother". Stand proud and feel good about your independence . Having been a totally indoctrinated "true believer", I am critical about many books. Some seem empty and repetitive about escaping the Watchtower. This is not like that. It has substance you can dig into. Do not waste time. Hit the purchase button NOW!

Very helpful book. I am a counselor and read book after I had a former JW client come in who had been unable to find her way. The book identified a multitude of reasons why It is hard to find your own way as well as giving some specific suggestions about how to take power back over your life. I like that the book focus’s on the solution being growth, experience and learning rather than looking at people as being damaged from their experience.

I was in this cult for 45 years. An "elder" for some 20 years. This book is an excellent portrayal of life inside, the difficulty of getting out, and how to normalize in the real world. Just as an aside, I have never been happier in my life than I am now. Freedom tastes so sweet when you've been a slave for so long! Thank you Bonnie Zieman!

Having been born and raised in a devout JW family, and having married into an equally devout JW family, I began discerning distinctions between Bible teachings and certain Watchtower teachings by the time I turned 30. That is when I began struggling with intense feelings of guilt, although I had not adopted a practice or lifestyle for which one could be disfellowshipped from one's congregation. By the time I turned 60, I realized I could no longer accept, support or recommend the JW religion, yet I was not free to pursue Christian fellowship outside the JW religion without dire consequences; therefore, I finally disassociated from JWs, yet my feelings of guilt only intensified. Psychotherapist Bonnie Zieman helped me identify two likely sources of the guilt which has plagued me for more than 30 years. EXISTENTIAL GUILT results from denying one's true self, especially when one fails to meet one's true potential, a feeling with which many JWs can identify. NEUROTIC GUILT comes from an imagined transgression such as changing one's mind on religious matters and leaving one's religion, a feeling with which most ex-JWs can identify. While existential guilt can serve as a healthy guide back to one's true self, neurotic guilt is unhealthy and damaging and is the type of guilt placed on doubting JWs by the Watchtower. If one does not understand the difference between the positive and negative types of guilt, the punitive part of one's mind (called the Superego) assumes one has sinned and deserves punishment, and one can end up unknowingly creating forms of self-punishment (e.g. depression, failures, accidents, chronic pain, illnesses, chronic anxiety, self-sabotage, etc.) Changing one's mind and leaving the Watchtower organization is not a sin, and one doing so certainly deserves no punishment! This is what I learned from Bonnie Zieman's wonderful book, and Bonnie provides many practical suggestions on how to rid oneself of such damaging guilt so that one can enjoy a happy and fulfilling life outside of the Watchtower Society. Thank you, Bonnie Zieman!

The Americanisms are distracting (for a UK reader), the prose is clunky, the constant poems are sickeningly cheesy......the subject matter is, however, thoroughly engaging and some of the tips are actually fairly useful. The problem with exit counselling is that former cult members must forge their own path, which automatically makes most of this book useless. That said, Bonnie does not ram anything down your throat (thank god!) and more suggests rather than prescribes her techniques for self-healing.Pick out the bits you like, there will probably be a few nuggets which make it worthwhile if you are an ex-JW

I liked the practical advice to help a person on the road to recovery after exiting a cult.I recommended it to a friend who suffers with anxiety after leaving the same cult as me.The advice was uplifting, practical & achievable wherever we are on our journey. I feel reassured & positive that I can recover from a lifetime of indoctrination & go on to live a happy, fulfilling life as myself without outside pressure or undue influence. A fantastic read for anyone who is leaving or has left a cult.

Very well written and helpful advice.

Arrived very quickly. Very informative. A good insight into who and what the J.W. and Watchtower is about.

See this book as a supplement to your healing from being a J.W. - tendency towards New Age terms and advices - very self strengtening book !