Pure: Inside the Evangelical Movement that Shamed a Generation of Young Women and How I Broke Free Audio CD – Audiobook, CD, Unabridged

It is easy to have a knee-jerk reaction to this scathing denunciation of the evangelical “pure” or abstinence movement in the 1990s, which challenged young people to wait until marriage to have sex--especially as an evangelical father who encouraged his teenage son and daughter to follow these guidelines. Probably her all-condemning title, Pure, with the subtitle Inside the Evangelical Movement that Shamed a Generation of Young Women and How I Broke Free, shocked me into reading it. The title, however, gives the false accusation that every young woman exposed to this movement was “shamed” by it, which of course she cannot rightfully claim since she only interviewed a couple of hundred women and it would take only one woman from her generation with her same circumstances to disprove her findings. I, personally, know women who were helped by the movement and I am confident there are thousands more who would disagree with Ms. Klein’s conclusion.Yet, despite her grandiose charge in the book’s title, she does make some valid points. For example, in the abstinence classes taught in public schools there is an analogy made with chewing gum saying that having sex with multiple partners is like chewing a piece of gum and giving it to someone else and someone else and someone else—the point being: “You wouldn’t want to chew that used piece of gum, would you? It’s the same way with sex.” Unfortunately, the underlying message communicated by this is: If you have had sex of any kind you are worthless and unworthy of a godly wife or husband even if you repent. I never liked this analogy, or those like it, because it does not take into account the forgiving nature of God and His redemptive abilities. The point, however, that Klein misses is: when couples do wait to share their physical intimacy with each other it is a precious gift they are bringing to the marriage relationship—the message being: I don’t want to do this with just anyone but only with the one I am committed to for life in the confines of a marriage covenant.Another point the author brought up is the double standard within some evangelical churches between men and women. She gives the example of being told to change her shirt when it got wet at a fundraising car wash while the boys involved were free to go shirtless. Good point. Why were boys allowed to go half nude and girls were not allowed to have wet shirts? They weren’t at a beach. She also wrote that she felt there was much more emphasis on women in her church on not being “stumbling stones” than for men not to lust after women.A third point, which could be controversial in some religious circles, was the restriction of women from leadership roles other than in Sunday school and children’s programs without the possibility of being recognized as valid ministers in other areas. She gives the testimony of an interviewee who had to be satisfied with being a Sunday school director when she felt called to minister to adults as well.Although I found Ms. Klein makes a few good points, after reading more than 50% of her book, it became apparent to me that she was not really interested in what the Bible teaches about sexuality, but only in expressing her own sexuality without feeling guilty about it. When she finally does lose her virginity in a Japanese hotel room at 26 with her boyfriend she writes: “I prayed the whole while. Thanking God for the moment, the man, and most of all, that I might finally be free. And a holy presence filled the room. My boyfriend startled. ‘Is someone in here?’ he asked. ‘Yes,’ I answered him.” According to the Bible, however, “fornication” (or having sexual intercourse without being married) or sexual immorality, is prohibited so if God’s presence did come into the room, you would think she would have refrained from it rather than going through with it. Yet, she takes that experience as a free pass to indulge the flesh and declares herself free from the shackles of shame. Although there are many verses in the New Testament regarding sexual immorality, here is one from 1 Thessalonians 4:3: “For this is the will of God, our sanctification: that you abstain from sexual immorality.”In the final analysis, Klein, who describes herself as “spiritual” as opposed to “Christian” and someone who cannot call God with a masculine pronoun, has created a god in her own image who conveniently shares her values regarding sexuality, and finds people and secular studies to justify her beliefs. Although she blames the “pure” movement and evangelicals with her sex/shame problem, she would have been more honest to say she simply does not agree with what the Bible plainly teaches about sexuality and leave it at that.As a “spiritual person,” I guess, as opposed to being a Christian, she is not bound to the Bible and its values. As a Christian, however, or Christ follower, whether young or old, the basis for faith and values is not how strongly one feels about something, or what other people say or do, it’s simply this: what does God’s Word say?2 Timothy 3:16 & 17: “All Scripture is God-breathed and is useful for teaching, rebuking, correcting and training in righteousness so that the man of God may be thoroughly equipped for every good work (NIV).”

I'm going to second other reviewers, here: if you are a female who grew up in an evangelical church or school, read this. Know that it will be a hard read. I was in tears at multiple points. I had to pace around my house while I read certain chapters. Chapters 4 & 13 address a lot of the unhealthy messages surrounding sexual abuse and victimization, although there is stuff about that spread all throughout the book. If you are survivor/victim, plan to read slowly and carefully. This book is a great combination of memoir and scholarly research-- enough that you will learn something without feeling like you are reading a textbook. I think this should be required reading for anyone working with youth groups or teaching for a Christian school. Even if you don't totally agree with her conclusions about a more liberated form of sexuality, it will make you think more carefully about the words that come out of your mouth when it comes to talking to youth about sex, relationships, and intimacy.To specifically address one of the 1 star reviews, she is definitely "tolerant" of the idea that abstinence can be healthy, and includes several accounts of interviewees who have chosen to be abstinent at most (or even all) time points in their lives. She has no issue with the concept of abstinence. Her issue is with the messages that have been used (especially in the uber-conservative branches of the evangelical church) in order to encourage abstinence. There is a huge difference. She doesn't shame anyone for making that choice. She calls out religious leaders for using remarkably unhealthy tactics for getting people to arrive at that choice.

Linda Kay Klein is an empathetic and trust-instilling guide as she tells her own story and shares some of those of her peers, giving voice to stories that haven't been heard. The experiences shared will resonate with many people--especially women--who grew up in or around the Evangelical movement in the United States. While this book addresses the purity movement specifically, Pure can be a healing read for those who have been harmed in other ways by the church. The book ends on an optimistic note--Klein hasn't given up on God, but she's found healing. For me personally, this book is a step toward healing some of the past hurt and trauma inflicted on me by the Evangelical movement and I suspect it will be helpful for others dealing with similar things.

Remember the mainstreaming of Evangelical Christianity and what it meant to be a young woman against a backdrop of purity rings and promising your virginity to Jesus? Remember what it was like to be a teenager and to be caught between wanting to explore your sexuality and being worried about not being pure and good enough to deserve respect? Who else remembers being told that your virginity was like chewing gum - once you "lost" it, you could never be whole again?Well I do, and Linda Kay Klein does, and she wrote an eye-opening, compassionate book about how women who grew up with these messages are still dealing with the effects as adults. Klein's book is told in a series of interviews with women who grew up in purity culture, and who feel the repercussions of that as adults - in their marriages and relationships, in their self-esteem and sense of self-determination, and with their relationship with God. This is a fabulous book for book clubs and group discussions -- there's much to unpack here, and I think anyone who grew up female in America will find a lot to connect with.

I didn't grow up in the evangelical world at all but was fascinated and drawn in by the stories and narrative throughout. The lessons that we are taught about sex, love, our bodies reverberate throughout our lives and hearing the stories in the book made me realize that even in worlds I don't understand there are lessons for me and my own life. It is a great read. Highly Recommend!

This book was informative, well written, and was very clear and concise. I really enjoyed reading this novel. I am very happy for what Ms. Linda Kay Klein has done.

A dark story, seasoned with hope. Klein carefully recounts the impact of the poor sexual theology that laces much of the evangelical church. Hopefully, these stories will help towards a healthy view of human sexuality.